Each of us sometimes has an unbearable desire to drink. Right now. And it doesn’t matter for what reason: stress at work, disappointment in life, grief or general fatigue. That's all we need. And each of us was faced with the lack of a sane drinking companion. At least once. There is a category of citizens for whom drinking in one person seems to be the last stage of moral decay, tantamount to admitting alcoholism on the verge of homosexuality, and therefore extremely unacceptable. Which I personally think is stupid, because drinking in one beak is quite fun. But that's not what this is about. So, sufferers often take their passion, real or potential, as their drinking companions. Which they greatly regret later. We will now try to figure out what dangers fraught with joint alcoholism with a member of the opposite sex, and also give some advice.

As for me, drinking with a woman is the same as going to the bathhouse with an amputee

He cannot soar himself, he is in a stupor and, even if he knows which end to take on, he cannot serve himself. The unfortunate person seems to feel something, but is unable to understand the high. And you rush around him with a glass-broom and serve him in every possible way, losing during the turmoil all the pleasure from the process of consumption and changing consciousness.

If you nevertheless decide to take such a dangerous and rash step, then know: there have been cases when another fragile girl remained on her feet even after a couple of liters of horse water, while the owner of stubble, muscles and festicles had long been throwing grub under the bench . And it’s extremely difficult to guess from the devils that they can drink like heavy ponies. Therefore, if you are not sure that your Frau will go crazy from a couple of thimbles, then it is better not to risk becoming a laughing stock.

You also need to be absolutely sure if we're talking about not about a permanent partner, that you are ready for unexpected declarations of love. After all, alcohol not only increases temperature and humidity, but also a brain dying from intoxication may require immediate reproduction, while your hole punch after a hussar drinking session may resemble a dirty sneaker lace. And again a shame.

But in addition to persistent geese, beware of those that are too greedy. After all, there is a high probability that you can get acquainted with her diet by studying the stains on her trousers

These are just a few of the dangers, but let's pay attention to the aesthetic side of the issue.

We men treat drinking like poetry. It is not for nothing that this process has such great amount synonyms. Just look at the melody of the word “fuck”! The drink itself is enough for us, which can easily get by with just a glass, albeit not a very clean one, and its excellent taste can be accompanied by a strong cigarette or an epic sniff of a friend’s hair! Imagine if you decide to sniff madame’s curls? Yes, you will vomit from the pungent and cloying aroma of her thoroughly chemical perfume. And, probably, in these same curls. And forget about friendship after that.

Moreover, climbing the steps of minimalism and focusing on the object of love, we don’t even need a glass! After all, you can drink from the throat, quacking contentedly from the strength and rich bouquet of the drink!

Admit it honestly, the perfection of alcohol is in no way compatible with the capricious female nature! Really, after a hard day of work, choosing even between the most banal and simple vodka and a woman, will you make a move towards the latter? Oh, don't be ridiculous! A woman can leave, but half a kilo of her “native” will never betray her. And tell me, is it possible to share this faithful, sincere and perfect drink with such a fickle nature, for which the quintessence of beauty is only an accompaniment to the meal?

It's good if you have drinks with her at home! What if you go to a restaurant?

All your money will go towards salad, food, dessert, wasted champagne and worthless coffee! But what about single malt whiskey? And the wonderful gin with a soft pine scent from childhood? And a sip of warm cognac with, albeit vulgar, but so pleasant lemon? Rum with a glass of Sprite? No, no and NO! Forget it!

You will eat salad with fucking arugula, drink sour champagne and talk about nonsense! And it will be called having a drink with a girl!

Most of them don't want to drink even divine Portuguese port! What is there to talk about...

A couple of glasses of sour Pinocchio with a small amount of ethylene, accompanied by a nasty thin cigarette and a couple of sweet berries, is called a drink! But what about calculating displacement from empty containers? Pride in the number of shots in the score? Satisfaction from the fact that you were able to “carry” to the toilet? Playing seasick pirate leaning over the side in a taxi? Exciting quiz “Who are you?!” in the bar? Are all these delights possible in the company of someone who, after the first of your innocent pranks, will say, “Stop disgracing me! You’re acting like a beast!”, will he be offended and not be friends with you?

Drinking with you at home, she won’t want to hear “you’re the same song that was played on the disc after which you killed Svetka.”

Drinking with you at a bar, she won't discuss the awesome tits of “that redhead over there.” Can you name at least one reason why you need to drink with a woman?! Well, at least one?

Sex?! Come on! If you really drink, you will get drunk to the point where you will be fucked. Don't make fun of or deceive yourself.

To summarize, drinking with a girl is bad from all sides. It's like traveling on Google maps. It seems like the process is going on, but something is wrong. It’s better to get drunk with a stranger in a bar, to get drunk alone, than to try to involve the one who was created to be your hangover-destroying happiness into the mystery of alcoholism.

Gone are the days when people drank only water, but now we prefer completely different drinks. Unfortunately, after these drinks there are serious consequences. Not everyone understands the difference between the two identical words “drink” and “DRINK”. You can “drink” water, mineral water, tea, coffee, milk, juices, but you can “DRINK” vodka, beer, wine, martini, cognac and other alcoholic drinks. Unfortunately, in modern world, many girls forgot that they were girls and began to drink alcohol on a par with guys, and sometimes even worse - which is much worse and more dangerous. After all female alcoholism- he is not being treated.

It is important to understand that alcohol and a girl are two completely incompatible things. No one is saying that you shouldn’t drink alcohol at all, but you should do it extremely rarely and in limited quantities. Many girls who read this article may find it funny, but there are still certain studies that allow us to say just that. So let's see how, from a psychological point of view, you can evaluate this or that choice of alcohol and compare it with the character of the girl.

1.Beer– as a rule, such girls are very sociable and simple. They prefer the company of men or the company of female friends who have male character. Usually, such girls are called “Your guy!” She can easily crunch on chips at 11 at night, watch football or hockey, talk about life, cars and appreciate your love affairs. Often, such girls try to be one of the men in a male company, where she is already the soul... Girls who prefer beer are usually calm, friendly, with a philosophical mindset. For them, the personal qualities of a person will come first, and not his material condition. So, for example, in high society she will evaluate not how much a car or watch costs, but the inner qualities of a person and whether there is something to talk about with him.

Such girls are simple and understandable; it is comfortable and pleasant for both girls and boys to communicate with them. Such girls are not appreciated by lovers of romance and sophistication.

2.Wine– such girls prefer to live beautifully, so to speak, “on a grand scale.” They often adhere to traditions, are sometimes conservative, and follow the rules of etiquette. In their environment, they value people who have the same views as they do. If you do not follow such qualities, you will quickly be taught.

Girls who prefer wine need a beautiful outer shell. Therefore, they will not appreciate a man who came late, without flowers, in a tracksuit and not shaved. The girls themselves also adhere to beauty - they are always well-groomed, neat, elegant, stylish, with good manners, sophisticated. Perhaps in her youth she wrote poetry or attended a drama club. She has many more girlfriends than friends. She loves to travel, but not like a savage, but with comfort and coziness.

But all of the above applies only to those girls who drink good and expensive wines. Girls who prefer to drink cheap mumbo jumbo don't belong to this category.

3.Cognac– girls who prefer this drink are confident in themselves, know what they want, and do not depend on other people’s opinions. In some places, “cognac ladies” are similar to “wine ladies,” but you need to multiply everything by 3. “To love is like a king, but to steal is like a trillion!” - such a statement exactly characterizes such a girl. Among cognac lovers there are almost never housewives or slackers; as a rule, these are big bosses or businesswomen (who have created their own business). These are tiger girls who, no matter what, go towards their goal. Often their mentality is more masculine than feminine. Such girls are independent, ambitious, energetic, and purposeful.

Such women more often initiate relationships and choose their own men.

4.Champagne– these girls consider themselves elite, they want to seem sophisticated and sophisticated. They are as airy and dreamy as bubbles in champagne.

5.Vodka– a girl who prefers to “drink hard” is a very bad sign. Such girls love to burden others with their problems. They are assertive, straightforward, rude, and not sentimentalists. As a rule, such girls want to drown their problems and grief with vodka: even if they are not in life, they are still present in her head.

6.Martini, sambuca, absinthe, tequila, etc.– apparently, such a girl understands fashion trends. But often, such girls in clubs just want to show off in front of others, to show how cool she is. Well, some people just want to relax and unwind.

7.All-Drinker- this is an unkind sign that indicates the approach of alcoholism. For such girls there is no difference in drinks; they drink whatever they pour. The main thing is to catch up faster and get drunk. Basically, this category of easily accessible girls is preferred by guys who want easy money to pick up in clubs so as not to pay “for a night of love.”

In general, you should drink only on holidays and with taste. Alcohol often affects your appearance, and not all guys like girls who drink.

The choice of alcohol should depend on the situation you find yourself in this moment. It seems to me that at this time there are practically no girls left who prefer only one drink. We all sin because we mostly drink whatever is poured. And this is not yet a sign of alcoholism. But still, we need to make sure that there is as little alcohol in our lives as possible, because there are so many other methods to cheer yourself up and have fun!

It's no secret that women prefer sweeter and less fortified alcoholic drinks. Women are interested in the taste, not the breath taken away to the point of tears. Light wine, sweet liqueurs, vermouths - minimum degree, small glasses, pleasant taste. Here are the top 5 most popular women's alcoholic drinks, their origins and small tips on choosing.

1. Champagne or a sparkling wine

Oh, those insidious and funny bubbles that women love so much! What holiday would be complete without them? However, what we call champagne is not such at all. The thing is that the word champagne can only be used correctly in relation to wine produced in the province of Champagne. The rest are sparkling wines that are produced all over the world. In Spain, such wine is called “Cava”, in Italy – “Spumante”, in Germany the popular name is “Sekt”, and sparkling wine produced in Bordeaux and Burgundy is called “Crémant”.

How to choose sparkling wine? It all depends on your taste preferences: doux - the sweetest, semi-sweet - demi-sec, semi-dry - sec and extra sec, dry - brut and extra brut, with minimum quantity sugar or no sugar at all. And if you are buying real champagne, then pay attention to the bottle number and the manufacturer’s abbreviation, by which you can find out its type. For example, NM (Négociant manipulant) is a company that buys grapes and produces wine, and ND (Négociant distributeur) is a merchant that sells wine under its own brand.

Fortress: from 10° to 14°

2. Vermouth

Vermouths are no less popular with women and absolutely not popular with men. From German the word vermouth is translated as wormwood and represents fortified wine, flavored with herbs.
Which vermouth should you choose? Experts divide this drink into five groups:

Dry - dry, sugar content does not exceed 4%;
. Bianco - white vermouth, it is sweeter and contains up to 15% sugar;
. Rosso - sweet and tart red vermouth with a sugar content of more than 15%;
. Rose - pink, usually somewhere between red and white;
. Bitter is a bitter vermouth that is least popular among ladies.

If you choose a country of origin, it is definitely France and Italy.

Fortress: on average from 15° to 18°

3. Liqueur

Women love sweets, most often dairy or coffee liqueurs, which are called dessert and creams. They are used both undiluted and in a variety of cocktails. This drink was produced back in the Middle Ages and was called the “elixir of life.” These were alcoholic drinks based on fruit and berry juices with the addition of roots and spices. Nowadays, the production of liqueurs is developed almost everywhere; Italian and Irish liqueurs are the most popular among women.

Liqueurs are selected based on taste preferences and additives. For example, in Japan they make green liqueur “Midori” with the aroma of white melon, and in Italy they make “Chinar” based on artichoke. Well, let’s list the sweet ones cream liqueurs possible indefinitely.

Fortress: on average from 15° to 30° (there are degrees higher, but this is no longer women's drinks).

4. Fruit beer

Beer has always been considered a man's drink, but recently fruit beer drinks have become incredibly popular. They are not bitter, they have pleasant aroma and are sold in small bottles - just what you need to become a girls' favorite. In addition, this beer has a low degree, which is also a plus for a women’s drink.

When choosing fruit beer, it is better to rely on well-known Belgian and German producers. If you want something sweet, then choose coconut beer, some bars even serve it in a coconut shell, and if you want something with a hint of sourness, choose Belgian cherry beer.

Fortress: 5°- 7°

5. Wine

And preferably pink, a delicate shade and with light aroma. What decent representative of the stronger sex would want to drink a bottle of rose wine with friends? And ladies like this drink.

The center of production of a third of the world's rosé wine is Provence, France. The taste is closer to white, while the color is closer to red wine. Interestingly, rosé wines are never made by mixing red and white.

Choosing pink wine, pay attention to its color. If you want a light taste and delicate aroma, then it should be a soft pink shade, made in France or Italy.

Andrey, consultant at the Wine Gallery store:

“Now there are no specific divisions into men’s and women’s drinks, as there were five years ago, everything is very individual. The drinking culture is developing, girls drink not only semi-sweet, but also dry wines. Of course, French rose wines, German semi-sweet whites, Italian wines and some liqueurs are popular. If you choose something as a gift (for example, on February 14), then, just like on New Year, sparkling wines are perfect.”

Which one is your favorite? alcoholic drink you?

: to make communication casual and get on a first-name basis, it’s not enough to impress her with your charm, you need at least a glass of sparkling wine. How can quick gentlemen be if the chosen one doesn’t drink at all? First, arm yourself secret knowledge what such girls are like and how not to get into trouble with them.

If a girl admitted at dinner that she has a negative attitude towards alcohol, there is no need to ask her about the reasons and, even worse, express strong surprise. Don’t focus on this and don’t put pressure on her with persuasion. The lady's word is law! There are many reasons not to drink alcohol, and they are always very personal. Be patient, when she is ready, she will tell you everything herself.

In order to dance until you drop, have fun and talk about all sorts of nonsense until the morning, you don’t have to be a lover of the “green snake”. So, if a girl refused to drink “Sex on the Beach” with you, this does not mean that she is a prim bore and will be against sex on the beach on the first date.

There are non-drinkers who feel uncomfortable being around drinkers, and there are others who are completely comfortable spending time in the company of friends while “tipsy.” Don't make assumptions; you may not have to give up your habits to please your date. Ask her directly if she would mind if you treated yourself to a shot of whiskey, and be respectful of any position she may have.

However, there is one “but”: if at the end of the evening you are very drunk compared to her, the likelihood that the date will end in a stormy night in bed decreases. Sex when both are drunk can be unforgettable, but if one of the partners is sober, it's not the same at all.

Plan in advance what she will drink at your home.

If you bring a girl home and offer her a drink, but there is nothing in your refrigerator except beer and water, you are unlikely to earn victory points. Knowing your girlfriend's preferences, be sensitive and stock up on the drinks she likes at home. Well, if you offer her something more complex than lemonade, for example, a non-alcoholic mojito or strawberry daiquiri, prepared with your own hands, consider yourself guaranteed success in the evening.

In fact, you can have a much more fantastic night with a sober girl than with a drunk one. She will remember every moment she spent in bed with you. And the most pleasant thing in the morning is not to regret anything and not to blame for taking advantage of her condition.

Say important words soberly

And finally. Never ask her the question: “What do you do if you don’t drink?” By pronouncing it, you seem to hint at her inferiority. Most likely, she goes to work, meets with friends, goes to different places, is interested in something - in a word, she lives the same life as you, with the exception of drinking alcohol. Is it really this small nuance will become an obstacle in your relationship?

I looked at the calendar and realized that December is inexorably rushing towards us, which will inexorably cover us all with a tsunami of New Year's parties, corporate events and cozy friendly gatherings, which tend to end with singing hits at karaoke, cheeky dancing on the bar and other outrages. In short, there is a high probability that in the foreseeable future you will often have to deal with a DUI (drunk girl). Moreover, with a decent “B”.

In our defense, I can say that sometimes a woman gets extremely drunk not because she has a history of a regiment of alcoholic relatives, or because she is stupid and attacked you in revenge, wanting to prove something. But simply because it happened. Due to, so to speak, fatal circumstances.

When, for example, during the day only a handful of arugula was in her stomach, and in the evening there was a party where she was immediately handed a glass, and then regularly refilled. And now, 40 minutes later, in front of you is a creature that has nothing in common with the neat young lady with an intelligent look and restrained gestures, whom you know and, perhaps, even love. Or, perhaps, to be more precise, he knew and loved?..

Judging by how unreasonably, dangerously and cruelly men begin to behave in such a situation, such metamorphoses are a great stress for you. But, I can swear on the volume of Pasternak: the stress will be even greater if you now have a huge quarrel, and in the morning, along with a hangover, there will come the need to somehow glue and repair what was “torn and trampled” due to alcoholic emotions. And to prevent this from happening, keep in mind what you should not allow yourself to do with and in relation to VD:

1. Take photographs and post “compromising evidence” on social networks

As we all understand, there is a gulf between how VD feels about herself (a gorgeous tigress/graceful panther/playful cat) and how she actually looks (cramped makeup, ridiculous grimaces and an expressive “arrow” on her tights). But she doesn’t realize this, so she trustingly poses for anyone who has a camera in their hands. But you, you see and understand everything! And therefore, the photos or videos you posted online, where VD looks like Zaza Napoli, and even 15 years older, will be not just a petty dirty trick, but outright bestiality.

Better instead: take pictures, don’t be lazy, be a real reporter, trying to catch the most piquant moments. But don’t post it anywhere, but save the pictures in a special secret folder, which you will present to the girl for review a couple of days later. If it really exists effective way convince a friend to be more careful or stop drinking alcohol altogether, then this is him.

2. Try to reason

It is only in your own eyes that you will look mature and responsible, saying: “Katya, get off the bar - you have a meeting at 9 am!” You're a bore and a buzzkiller - VD will decide about you.

Better instead: fiddle with your phone and, making a sad face, say that you just received a letter about rescheduling an important meeting at 9 am. This way you will look like just a bore, and your boss will turn out to be the kicker.

3. Clarify the relationship

Firstly, you won’t agree on anything good anyway. And secondly, VDs love to behave like the heroines of French cinema: escalate the situation to the limit, and then run away into the night, sparkling with bare shoulders and tears as bitter as wormwood tincture. And the more confident the minus is outside the window, the more optimal this option for resolving the conflict seems to the VD.

Better instead: firstly, divide everything said by VD by 5, or even 10. Yes, what is on the tongue of a drunk is on the mind of a sober person. But usually in much, much lower concentrations. And her “You don’t understand me at all!” could easily mean “You didn’t like my last two posts on fb.” And to quarrel over this, you must admit, is somehow even stupid.

Secondly, if the escalation of the conflict could not be avoided, and the VD ran off into the night, forgetting about prudence and a coat, then run after her. Run! No matter how idiotic this whole scene looks. With disheveled women in disheveled feelings, wandering alone along the street, some kind of trouble can and will certainly happen. And the fact that she gets a cold in her appendages, sobbing at the foot of the monument to the heroes of Plevna, is not the most dramatic outcome of the evening.

4. Being nice to someone else

VDs usually develop amazing psychic and telepathic abilities. And at the same time, sometimes the third eye opens. Where an ordinary woman sees harmless flirting, VD, with this very third eye, will discern a full-fledged betrayal, which you, such a brute, are committing almost before her eyes. Even if it’s just a timid glance after the leaving waitress, who, it seems, is not going to bring you change.

Better instead: start some erotic outrage together with VD. Yes, even in the toilet of a restaurant or in the darkest corner of the dance floor. Firstly, this way there is a chance not to miss the desired condition of your partner - when she is already, but not quite yet (if you decide to wait until home, you will not be dealing with an insatiable houri, but with a sniffling koala, which is also seasick in a taxi). Secondly, in terms of its sobering effect, sex is sometimes even more effective than two double espressos. Well, thirdly, she will also be calmer for you (it’s difficult to suspect a man who has just had sex of cheating, but literally his fly has not yet had time to cool down), and you for her (not having found an admirer in your face, she’s probably won't give up searching).

5. Making her orgasm

Due to the fact that under the influence of alcohol the receptors become less susceptible to external influences, VD is akin to the ladyboy from Walking Street Pattaya: she looks much more suitable for sex than she actually is. Well, that is, purely technically, she can and is ready to have sex. And he will even take all possible part in the process and dig his nails into your back. However, all your sophisticated caresses, designed to bring your partner to orgasm, will be felt by the VD as if you were palpating her clitoris through the fabric of a wetsuit.

Better instead: Focus on getting pleasure yourself, rather than giving it to your partner. In the end, sexually, VD is a very accommodating and relaxed creature. It would be stupid not to take advantage of this.